Sunday, June 12, 2011

annoying log.

Hahaha look what I found :D
I wrote this agess back, must've been pretty pissed at that time.

It's a list of the sort of people who annoy me XD


1. People (especially fat aunties) who practically bulldoze you over at weddings so that they can get to the food first. In the case of the aunties, this can be rather painful, owing to the fact that they are sticking their bejeweled bent arms out, and are wearing clothes with so much embroidery on them that they resemble chain mail. They usually then proceed to pile their plates so high with botian (kukkar ho to best hai!); they would put Mt Everest to shame.


2. People who, in broad daylight, wear sunglasses. These are usually the Gucci (pronounced ‘guski’)/Armani/Ray Ban imitations you can get by paying fifty rupees to a roadside stall vendor (available in all colours.). Especially annoying if you are trying to talk to the person in question, and cannot see their eyes. Due to obvious reasons.

3. The salesmen in practically all types of stores, from places selling CDs to books to ketchup, who follow you around the whole goddamn, hanging around at the end of the aisle and staring at you, apparently trying to make sure you do not steal anything. Yes, my sole purpose in life is to shove a roll of toilet paper up my sweater and run out of the store without getting caught. In fact, it's the reason I was born. I've been getting special training for it since I was two months old! :/

4. People, in buses and various other means of public transport, who like to discuss their business deals on their mobile phones at the top of their voices so the whole world can hear. They simply cannot understand the fact that their fellow passengers may not want to know how much they are selling their piece of land on the suburbs of Gut Wala for! Matlab seriously, dude, keep it down!

5. Persons in buses (usually seated right in front of you) who like to recline their seats as far back as possible and then incessantly move about, trying to get comfortable while you are smushed up in the back, thinking what a significant amount of effort it is taking to draw in breaths. It is also particularly unfortunate if they happen to frequently break wind..

6. People who have extremely bright white headlights fitted in their cars and enjoy turning them up and flashing them in your eyes at night when you are passing them from the opposite direction, making it virtually impossible for you to see where you are going. Shoday kahin key.

7. Aunties and uncles who come to visit with their bratty children, and tell them to go and play with ‘behna’ (the horror) or ‘bhai’. They then proceed to ruin your belongings, and yell for mumsy if you refuse to give them something in particular. Such as your cellphone. Or your laptop. 

8. People who tell you the life history of all their family and extended-family members and then expect you to remember What Gondal Uncle Said On Lala Bhai’s Wedding. When you fail to answer (which is very likely) they refuse to talk to you for weeks. Good riddance.

9. The 'photographers' that have suddenly started popping up on Facebook. Seriously, taking pictures with a DSLR and making them go a little blurry at the edges does not make you a photographer. Please stop.



10 comments:

  1. LOL. This made me do the 3 letter abbreviation at the beginning of this comment.

    Great post and very humourous / true as well.

    :)

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  2. LOL. xD OMG SO TRUEEEE.
    This was so hilarious and interesting.

    P.s What does FYF stands for?

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  3. Kukkar da scene aye jinaab bus.

    sunglasses are supposed to be worn in bright daylight i think ...*wonders*

    People actually do run with things so the poor guy has to do his job otherwise his shift manager would pan him. its a lose lose situation for him.

    Its a public bus. They can do whatever they want :P you want inner peace go watch kung fu panda :P

    if they allow the seats to be reclined that far then its the bus manufacturers fault. They should not make seats that recline so far.

    the headlights people are just making sure they see clearly enough to avoid any potential accidents plus working as a street light at the same time. They are doing such service to public. saving lives and brightening up the night:P

    don't take them to your room. Brats will be brats. Do quality assurance, not quality control. keep them in ur siblings room :P *simple solution*... with an impish grin.

    let them get naraz. Why bother to even get annoyed with it?

    Well if someone wants to take photographs with a dslr then what is the big deal? its their camera, their profile, their pictures, their life :P if something makes them happy then so be it!

    and before you get angry and ready to smack but trying to control your anger and give a clever response just like your Capricorn nature tells u to :P .... i was just kidding :P ...

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  4. 3, 7, 8 and OH MY GOD THE WANNABE PHOTOGRAPHERS ARE THE WORST *dies*
    this was super funny, it made me take a couple of spins on my wheelie chair as a substitute for rolling on the floor laughing. :D

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  5. @Nas: Thankingz thankingz :D

    @Maryam: Sam to you. :P FYF? Bataoo gi kisi din XD

    @eddiesdomain: Hahahaaa. First, thank you for reading through the whole hing and taking out the time to post sucha long comment :)
    And naw, I didn't get mad :P Cus I think like that alll the time, keh who am I to say something? I'm chill as long as they're fine with it :|
    And like I said, I wrote this ages back, probably when I was pret-ty worked up at such people for some reason :P

    @Furree: Hahaha thankoo babe ^_^

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  6. you are welcome :D... yes being chill matters :D *hi5* for that.

    *secretly though* they kinda bug me too *somtimes* :P shhhh 8-) haha

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  7. Um, so when do people wear sunglasses? I mean, it's so that they wear them so that their corneas don't get fried, not just to surreptitiously look at boobies.

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  8. lets drown them in my pond. *muahahahaha * *evil plan laugh*

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  9. @eddiesdomain: *hi5* :D

    @P: OMG I JUST NOTICEDD! 'In broad daylight' :p AHAHAHHAHAHAH WHATA STUPIDO I AM! :D
    Thank you for pointing zat out.

    @Pond Toad: Excellent idea D:

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  10. LOL the first one is on top of my list too...i never enjoyed the food at paki weddings...well i only been to like three of them

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